One day I walked into my favorite Starbucks, contemplating what I was going to write about that week, and I noticed a new sign on the door.
It read: “It’s not about you or us. It’s about change. Change for the better.”
The sign went on to inform its customers that the store would be closing for a week for remodeling. Tuning in and listening with my heart, the message spoke to me about healthy detachment.
What I have come to realize is that sustaining healthy detachment is reminding ourselves that whatever is happening isn’t about you or me-it’s about the grander scheme of transformation.
It means accepting and moving with the constant flow of change no matter what the remodeling may look like or where it may take us in our lives. Transformation calls us to step outside of our own little world, realize the bigger picture in front of us, and make a shift in our consciousness that is always for the better.
When we practice healthy detachment, we don’t take the everyday irritations and disappointments of life to heart. In fact, we learn to disengage from the behavioral patterns, mindsets, and expectations that set us up for constant disenchantment. We begin our day in gratitude, knowing that there will be challenges ahead and trusting that we are never given more than we can handle.
Using healthy detachment as a tool, we have to open our hearts and listen to the inner voice that guides us from stepping into the familiar traps of fear, control, and complacency. We can remain flexible with how the day unfolds instead of forcing our expectations upon it.
So therefore, when we are caught in a traffic jam, receive an unexpected call from our boss, or hear that the stock market has dropped another hundred points, we can pause, take a deep breath, and remember to stay centered and fully detached from the outcome of external events. Remind yourself gently and lovingly that this too shall pass and stay constant in the flow of positive energy no matter what is unfolding before you.
Later that same day, I was in Home Depot picking up a few things to help with remodeling my home environment to make it more energy efficient.
As I was checking out, I witnessed one store clerk asking another clerk if she was depressed. She replied, “Yes, with my home situation.” The other clerk smiled and said, “Animals become extinct because they can’t change their environment. Yet, human beings can change their environment and you can too.”
She looked at him, nodded, and then finished my transaction. Our eyes met and I smiled too. No words needed to be expressed because the message was crystal clear for both of us.
Everyone and everything will transform in one way or another. The power we have is in sustaining healthy detachment to both personal and global changes, realizing that our inner and outer environments need continuous remodeling.
Yes Debra- healthy detachment is so important and it takes knowing and fully loving oneself to be able to fully feel and understand that . thank you xxx
When I met my husband he bought me a ring that had “This too shall pass” engraved on it. While I don’t always feel detached, this simple phrase helps me step away from small dramas, see the big picture and trust that “Everything will turn out well”, which was engraved on his matching ring.
Ooooh…. not much is personal unless I make it so. I have the ability to make conscious choices and to take appropriate action. Thanks!
Deb, this is a great reminder, not only to remain present but to also remember that we are only uncharge of us and our immediate environment, both inner and outer. Especially, when we are first implementing and feeling the effects of the changes because it is then that we want to take the reigns and control and implement change all around us. So the detachment serves a wonderful reminder.
Love this Debra and this is what I have been most focused on the last few weeks as it can appear that everything is going a little haywire. By using health detachment there is such a trust that all is okay and that truly DOES make everything okay. I know I only know an infinitesimal amount of the whole picture and by trying to control or resist – I only cause me and the people around me pain and angst. What a beautiful story and reminder! Thank you!
Healthy detachment makes all the difference in the world … and for the world as well.
Yes it does especially with the quality of our energy and our lives. Thanks Barb xo
Debra such a good reminder! My late mom used to say “this too shall pass.” So simple yet such a powerful affirmation to help us keep moving forward. Thank you! <3
Thank you Kara! I love that expression Kara and your mom sounds like an inspiring woman. xo